In this deeply human conversation, coach Paul Buono opens up about identity, perfectionism, OCD, lupus, disordered eating, fear-based avoidance, and the path to becoming a more integrated person. The episode explores how tunnel vision—whether toward fitness, career, or health—can disconnect us from friendships, opportunities, and fully living.
We also talk about coaching psychology, small wins, micro-habits, routines, messy life transitions, and why connection is the most important part of health.
This one is rich with insight, self-awareness, compassion, and extremely relatable struggles. Paul’s honesty helps listeners feel seen, and his coaching philosophy shines through story after story.
⏱️ Timestamps
00:00 – Intro — Chris opens the episode and asks Paul for a short personal intro.
01:00 – Who Paul Is Beyond Coaching — identities outside of career.
02:00 – The struggle with accepting help — Chris’s couch story and independence.
03:00 – Tunnel vision & the “rabbit wheel” — Paul’s CrossFit era and missing life.
04:00 – Living like a racehorse — blinders, achievement, and imbalance.
05:00 – Anchors in life: people who pull you out — Chris’s travel breakthrough.
06:00 – OCD, fear, and exposure therapy (ERP) — Paul goes deep.
07:00 – Fear of the future & “3-2-1 just do it.”
08:00 – Closing the loop: exposure → proof of safety
09:00 – When OCD shapes your whole life — childhood patterns, checklists.
10:00 – Eating disorder origins & control
11:00 – Lupus diagnosis shrinking his world — hypervigilance & restriction.
12:00 – Bringing your own soap to work — how extreme it became.
13:00 – Reintegrating with the real world — embracing discomfort.
14:00 – Safe foods vs connection — Chris’s nutrition reflection.
15:00 – Real Coaches Summit impact — connection > fear.
16:00 – Diversity in fitness & hidden limitations
17:00 – Hearing impairment + jiu jitsu — Chris’s perspective.
18:00 – Nothing has to be perfect to still be worth it
19:00 – People think coaches are perfect—but we’re not
20:00 – Coaching breakthrough story — client who transformed through compassion.
21:00 – “You have to be willing to look like an idiot.”
22:00 – Shortening the gap after setbacks — from 6 weeks to 2 days.
23:00 – Micro-habits & clothes on the toilet seat
24:00 – Setting people up for wins instead of overwhelm
25:00 – Turning weaknesses into strengths (homemade pizza story)
26:00 – Tiny details that unlock big adherence
27:00 – Breaking workouts into 5-minute chunks
28:00 – Plan A vs Plan B programming
29:00 – Weight trends vs real progress
31:00 – Compassion > criticism
32:00 – The brain’s bias toward threat
34:00 – In-person training and human connection
36:00 – Why funny stories often reveal wins
38:00 – Chris’s philosophy in-person training
39:00 – Are relationships scalable in online coaching?
41:00 – Loneliness, AI, and the future of fitness
42:00 – Chris’s Substack & predictions about the future
44:00 – Online coaching delivery models
46:00 – Automation for call scheduling (backend vs client-facing)
48:00 – Exposure therapy in everyday life (dishwasher story)
50:00 – Removing life “leaks” one decision at a time
51:00 – Moving out post-divorce & ripping the bandaid
53:00 – When chaos moves you forward faster
54:00 – Leaning into discomfort & not waiting for perfect clarity
55:00 – Paul’s January coaching waitlist
56:00 – Paul’s life advice: know your values, prioritize authentically.
Paul Buono
Instagram: https://instagram.com/paulbuono
Website: https://paulbuono.com
Host Links:
Podcast: https://podcast.invigoratetraining.com
Training: https://invigoratetraining.com/
Media Consulting: https://christianliddle.com/
Store: https://store.invigoratetraining.com
